From text messages, to Instagram, to online dating sites, the tech landscape has changed the way we date and most of that change has been amazing. According to a recent Pew Research survey, nearly half of adults who have ever used online dating have used dating sites to find their current romantic partners. But that doesn’t mean they are any happier than the rest of us. While using technology may be convenient, using technology to get into a relationship is a big no-no.
1/4. When “tweeting” a date, it shows they are too afraid to actually meet in person. “When I got the first text message, I thought it was a scam. It told me how she found me and how great the person was,” remembers one New Jersey woman who has been looking for love online for a few years now. “She was actually serious. It made me think if she had something to hide, she wouldn’t do it this way. To me, that meant she was honest about her intentions and she really wanted to meet me.”
2/4. When you’re on a dating site or app, you need to always be vigilant about meeting people in person and getting to know them. When she was on OkCupid, a dating app for and active user base of single women, she never messaged anyone she wasn’t on a first date with. “When you see a picture, it’s easy to know if they’re a good match or not. If I’d seen someone I was attracted to, but wasn’t sure about, I’d want to meet with them first,” she explains. “The longer you’re on an app, the easier it is to weed out bad dates or people who want to meet with you just because they have the app.”
3/4. With apps and online dating, you need to get your feet dirty to meet people in real life. “I remember staying up really late the first time I met my boyfriend on a dating app,” says Brandon, who used to live in Los Angeles. “It was 4 a.m. in New Jersey and I had just checked my messages and saw a ‘like’ on my profile. I didn’t answer—my next day was a work trip. I figured it was a quick little romantic encounter, but I never heard back. I was sort of thrown by it, but now that I know better, I do it all the time.”
Sure, you’re a modern girl. You are totally comfortable with that fact and are proud of it. You’re not afraid to flaunt it and flaunt it well. But before you go throwing yourself head first into the dating pool, remember that the more you know, the better equipped you’ll be to finally get that first date you’ve been looking for. So without further ado, here are 17 things to know to get you out of the dating doldrums.
You’re in Demand
It’s a good thing that you’re good-looking. You always have been, or at least, that’s what everyone in your high school has told you. You’ve probably been blessed with the kind of ‘pretty girl’ looks that gets you a head-turning glance every time you walk into a room. At the ripe old age of 29, you might be starting to think that’s all you’re going to get out of the dating world.
It’s not that you’re unattractive, it’s that you seem to just blend into the masses. You just seem like someone who doesn’t stand out. That’s why your Facebook feed has so many photos of other pretty girls and your friends keep chatting about their new trendy cafés. And even when you do chat about something totally not fashionable—like, say, politics—you’re not the type to really take part in the conversation. You aren’t saying anything, but you’re just there.
Like the unwritten rules of the locker room at the gym, pretty girls are the most desirable type. You’ve been “liked” on Facebook more times than you can count, while your online dating profiles are littered with cute guys desperately hoping to sweep you away. Maybe you’re not as pretty as the girl in the bathroom mirror, but there is absolutely no question that your looks have landed you the pick of the litter.
While you’re not particularly bothered by it, you do find yourself getting asked a lot more often, especially if you’re known for your looks. You love to tell cute guys, “No thank you,” because you know they must be a bit at a loss as to why you haven’t accepted their advances. You love a good compliment, but you also hate doing the same thing to guys. You’re not really interested in the guy that keeps trying to get a glimpse of that beautiful peaches-and-cream complexion of yours.